One thing that I noticed that I thought interesting this time is the way in which Jane Austen compares the two romances of Jane-Mr. Bingley and Eliza-Mr. Darcy.
Mr. Bingley has a tendency to be uncritical of people and situations. Some might call it naive, but I noticed something several years ago that led me to question that assumption. In situations where a person is constantly treated as if they are flawed, it tends to increase the severity and occurrence of that flaw.
The situation that I noticed was a marked influence on a person's behaviour based on the expectations of the people around them. The way in which it manifested itself was that if Earl had some character flaw and all that Bob ever expected from Earl was that flaw, it created a moral vortex from which it was almost impossible for Earl to escape from.
Any small step that Earl might take towards fixing his character flaw (or small stumble as is more likely) would immediately be either laughed at by Bob thus creating a negative experience for Earl whenever he tried to break his habit. Earl in the face of this unrelenting pessimism would focus his attention on his brokenness and tread-water in an ocean of guilt and shame.
The previous example is a hyperbole and does not happen to that degree of severity very often. However, it would not be hard to associate a constant negative and generally pessimistic attitude by another person to one's flaws to result in a certain amount of apathy and unwillingness to try to improve one's condition.
The opposite is also true. If someone encourages and is generally optimistic about one then it can be incredibly motivating to try and better oneself.
Any small step that Earl might take towards fixing his character flaw (or small stumble as is more likely) would immediately be either laughed at by Bob thus creating a negative experience for Earl whenever he tried to break his habit. Earl in the face of this unrelenting pessimism would focus his attention on his brokenness and tread-water in an ocean of guilt and shame.
The previous example is a hyperbole and does not happen to that degree of severity very often. However, it would not be hard to associate a constant negative and generally pessimistic attitude by another person to one's flaws to result in a certain amount of apathy and unwillingness to try to improve one's condition.
The opposite is also true. If someone encourages and is generally optimistic about one then it can be incredibly motivating to try and better oneself.
Very good! Aren't you proud of me?! I managed to read the whole thing! ;) XD
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